I'm afraid it's a brand new subscription and started with the September Issue this week - maybe I'll have to ask them nicely for a back copy....

I think sensitivity to excessive noise is a duffing characteristic (re the volume control in cinemas).
I find noise persecutory these days.
No sooner have I found a quiet spot to sit down (it is, sad to say, sometimes necessary to go out), having first carried out a careful inspection to ensure no roadworks or potential mobile-phone shouters, someone starts sand-blasting a wall I hadn't noticed or sucking up leaves with a giant vacuum cleaner.
Apart from the obviously appalling (mobiles, transportable music machines and other inventions from hell) why does a mechanical voice on a bus constantly tell me the number of the bus I am on? Why is it necessary to play loud dance music in shops or to have a badly tuned radio on as back-ground noise in a cafe? Why does everything these days come with its own signature-tune sound, like lorries that beep when they reverse?

Well, actually lorries beep when they reverse because they can't really see what is behind them. It is so people don't get run over. Some noise is nessasary. Have you thought of earplugs?

I too can identify with many of the activities and pastimes already mentioned here so I guess that makes me a duffer too...

However, since the activities appear to give great pleasure I wonder if most duffers are also grumpies when confronted with activities they don't like or approve of?

Indeed, could disapproving of something provide a duffer like pleasure?

No. Disapproval is an unfortunate by-product. It comes from a fundamental truth - duffers are ALWAYS in the right. Of course. The following are undeniably WRONG, and therefore worthy of the patronising grimace:
1. MP3 players on buses and trains - I'd actually prefer it if they were playing their rubbish through a Bose SoundDock - at least the quality would be bearable. They are clearly insane.
2. Lack of manners - hand in hand with intrusive noise-makers but there's so many sub-strata I don't even want to start. Oh.... just one then... QUEUE TO GET ON THE BUS, PEOPLE. QUEUE, LIKE YOU'RE A MEMBER OF CIVILISATION.
3. Cars converted into farting, burping, bass speakers, churning out the most god-awful language and sexism, BECAUSE THE DRIVER THINKS IT'S COOL! How ironic is that?
4. People ignoring pregnant and old people on crowded transport. And yes, the worst culprits will be travelling for free. If you're young enough to travel for free, you're young enough to stand up.
5. People being rude to shop-keepers - a woman the other day walked into our local newsagent and, without looking at the man behind the counter, and standing as far away as possible from him, simply said 'lottery'. Now, what is this supposed to mean? I know, and he knows, but lord knows, it stinks.

Hm, I need a lie down for now. The old blood pressure's risen again.

You're dead right JL - and I guess that makes me a proper duffer too.

What about people who throw cigarette ends on the floor when they've finished their death stick? Completely unacceptable in my view. If you have to smoke, at least be responsible and be tidy.

Jon Lloyd - if duffers are always right, what happens when we disagree?

For the past 18 months I have used the same stick too stir paint when I am decorating, it has its own place under the sink. Does this make me a duffer or have I turned into my father?

Could be both, could be both...

Duffers never disagree, they just give a melancholy shrug.

And the amount of times I've wanted to comment on the fact that it should be 'Hear our prayer', not 'Here our prayer'... but that's just pure griping, and not necessarily a duff.

I recently snapped the bamboo stick I always use to stir paint in half. Now I have two, and in terms of physics it also makes for a more vigorous stir.

I have a special wooden spoon that is used only for porridge. Nothing else. I get very cranky if it is picked up for something like pasta sauce or eggs. Any other taste would corrupt the porridge. True. It's like the whole 'tea in a brown pot' thing.

JL thanks for the tip to make my stick more efficient.

I have just seen a report on the BBC about a new MP3 player(WALKMAN) that cancels out noise from its surroundings to give the listener a better listening experience, surely they should be concentrating on cancelling out the noise eminating from the player!

I'm curious about how cats and 'going down to Kent' qualifies as duffing. How stands going down to East Sussex, which I like to do more than Kent. Is that duffing or almost duffing?

I've liked cats since I was 6. I've been going to Kent since I was 25. Have I started duffing very young?

Psyche and Jon could be me writing. I get so anoyed with these so called personal sterios which you can sit half a bus away and hear. When those kids get to my age they will be deaf.
Basically I get upset hearing any wireless except The Home Service ( Radio 4 for younger members ) at a pinch World Service acceptable.
Also people who want a ticket at a train station or get on a bus whilst still carrying on a mobile conversation. This is the height of rudeness as the booking clerk or driver should be treated with respect. I would refuse to serve these ignorants

I can reasure all you 'duffers' that the majority can't stand these attention seekers who insist in playing their 'music' on public transport.
My mate told me yesterday that he wears his socks in bed, does that make him a duffer?

Does anything more than a passing interest in the railway system qualify me as an official old duffer?

I don't think 'going down to East Sussex' is the same as 'going down to Kent' duffing-wise, but that is just my view. A liking for cats doesn't qualify one as a duffer - don't worry! - unless coupled with other duffing activities (multiduffing). A keen interest in railway systems, railway timetables, and rolling-stock: yes, that certainly is suggestive of the duffer.

Cats are duffers. Ergo, a liking for cats is a dufferish inclination.

Think about it:
They're quite often grumpy
Need for solitude
Desire for comfort at all costs
Constantly 'wrapped up warm'
Detest loud noise
Disdainful of others' silly ways

If they weren't so scared of vehicles they'd undoubtedly spend hours down at the train tracks, notebook in one hand, flask of warm milk in the other.

Railway systems, perhaps, timetables, yes, but from the point of view of needing to get about, rolling stock....noteboooks, flasks, ummm no.

Semi-Duffer????